My Number One Pitches

The biggest comics news in a long, long time–if you haven’t already heard–is that starting in September, DC Comics will be releasing new comics digitally on the same day they’re released in physical stores. As I understand it, that’s huge, considering retailers have fought hard to keep this from happening. But I don’t buy or read my comics digitally, so it doesn’t mean much to me right now. The really big news for me (and a whole lot of other people, I would assume) is that DC is rebooting their entire universe in September with 52 issues all starting at #1. There’s talk that this reboot will remake DC’s stable of superheroes into something more diverse–which presumably means more leading characters who are female, people of color, and/or not heterosexual. This is fantastic for all of us superhero comics fans who aren’t, y’know, bigots.

Judd Karlman and Gareth-Michael Skarka have both written their pitches for DC reboots. I figure it’s time for me to get in on this action. So here goes.

Doom Patrol: Robotman, Negative Man, Crazy Jane and the Chief are the outsider superheroes nobody is ever glad to see. They investigate the fringes of reality, where magic and science meet. Alternate dimensions, lost civilizations, time travel, occult conspiracies, alien weirdness, the uncanny, the eerie, the unexplained is their bread and butter. I’d mash up the original Drake/Premiani stories with Grant Morrison’s seminal run, throw in some Lee/Kirby Fantastic Four, Ellis/Cassaday’s Planetary, the weirdest stuff Jack Kirby and Steve Ditko did and the wonkiest bits of Doctor Who to make a surreal, bizarre series featuring misfits and freaks.

The Sandman: By day, Sandy Hawkins is a rich dilettante, inheritor of the estate of wealthy playboy Wesley Dodds. By night, Hawkins–plagued by insomnia and nightmares–dons a gas mask, a dark trenchcoat and fedora. Armed with a gun that fires sleeping gas, he races through the dreamy, shadowy night to solve unsolvable crimes as the Sandman! Think Batman with fewer gadgets and weirder enemies, filtered through David Lynch, Salvador Dalí and Winsor McCay.

Mister Miracle: Shilo Norman isn’t just some orphan from the worst projects in Metropolis, he’s also the world’s greatest escape artist! He can escape from anything: ropes, chains, handcuffs, cages, locked rooms, debt, depression, time, space–even Hell itself! As Mister Miracle, Shilo’s a flamboyant performer, a keen detective and a swashbuckling daredevil. In colorful stories of high adventure, Mister Miracle travels through all of time and space, freeing people from the bonds of slavery, tyranny, conformity and madness.

Those are my pitches. I think I could write the hell out of any of those. What about you? What DC titles would you reboot?

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One thought on “My Number One Pitches

  1. Pingback: goblin cartoons » Blog Archive » Reboot Bebop

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